Perfect Slow-Cooker Beef Poutine

I’m just going to go out on a limb and say I hate carpet, because sooner or later it needs to be steam cleaned, especially when my well-intentioned hubby decides to buy our kitties the Old-Fart Cat Food instead of the usual variety, and they spend a couple of weeks barfing it up. Everywhere. I should probably not talk about cat barf and food in the same post, but oh well. Too late.

Do they make a hand-held dust-buster version of a steam cleaner, by the way? Inquiring minds need to know. Alternately, if any flooring companies have sponsored post opps, I do a mean version of Bob the Builder.

Just sayin’. 

So I joke and say I got “away” for the weekend, which really means that instead of vacationing someplace fabulous, or even spending a weekend loafing in my PJs and Netflixing, “away” means that I closed the lid on my laptop and spent a weekend doing the unpleasant things that have accumulated. Like the carpet. Like ripping out the dead tomato plants from my planter, which I kind of neglected for the last month. Like finally finding something to do with the pile of old duvets and throw blankets (most to Goodwill) that was sitting in a broken plastic laundry basket (re-homed in the garbage).

Sorry, I couldn’t in my wildest dreams think of something DIY crafty to do with the laundry basket. If you can, feel free to chew me out in comments. I’ll take it as educational.

But that’s neither here nor there. We’re talking about food, right?

Right.

I love you, Crock Pot. Never turn evil. I have this exact one, by the way, although it’s decidedly less shiny by now.

So anyway, one of my favourite things to do in the winter is to throw a chuck roast in the slow cooker and then ignore it all day. And some 6-8 hours later, I have delicious fork-tender beef that I can do whatever the heck I feel like with, and everybody thinks I’m a rock star. Certain cuts of beef… like the super-tough rump and chuck? They gotta be braised, yo. But the fact that they’re the tough parts makes them the most awesome tasting in the end. Shhh. Don’t tell my secret.  

After a hard day of raking leaves and pulling plants, I couldn’t think of anything more Canadian to do than make poutine and go watch hockey.

Now if you’re one of my American friends, you are probably lost and saying what the heck is poutine? French fries, gravy, and cheese curds, my friends. Sometimes we mix it up by throwing chili, beef, or pork on top. And if this doesn’t sound appealing to you, then you just have no idea that the Canadians don’t eff around when it comes to dressing up their french fries, man. 

It took me a little while to warm up to poutine, but that’s mostly because for all their strengths, Canadians have a weird sense of what’s proper in gravy. I’m over it. When I make a beef chuck pot roast, I have plenty of the cooking liquid left over to make gravy. And then I still have enough leftovers to make hot roast beef sandwiches too. 

Poutine, ho!

Oh and if you want to try to make your own, and can’t find cheese curds? Just cube up some cheddar.

I won’t tell. 

Perfect Slow Cooker Beef Poutine

2014-11-03 07:47:29

A perfect beef poutine, prepared mostly in your crock pot.

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Ingredients

1. 3-5 Lb pot roast of any kind (sometimes called blade, rump, or chuck)
2. 1/4 cup soy sauce (<- do not leave this out, this is what makes your broth awesome)
3. ~1L of low-sodium beef stock (1 box if using boxed)
4. 1/2 cup red wine
5. Minced garlic (about 2 cloves)
6. 1/2 sliced white onion
7. 1/4t pepper
8. Cheddar cheese curds
9. Cornstarch
10. French fries

Instructions

1. Place the roast in the bottom of the crock pot liner, and add the soy sauce, wine, broth, garlic, onion and pepper.
2. Cover and cook on high 6-8 hours, or low 8-10 hours or until roast is tender and shreddable.
3. Prepare your french fries.
4. While fries are cooking, transfer about 1.5 cups of the cooking liquid to a small saucepan on medium heat. Combine about 2T (heaping) of cornstarch in a cup with just enough water to make a thick liquid, and whisk into simmering gravy until thickened.
5. Top fries with shredded beef, cheese curds, and gravy.

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